In June of 2024, we welcomed our sweet baby boy into the world. And he has become my whole world.

I took some time away from writing here in part because well, birthing a child is intense stuff. And also because though I share here, I’m a more private person and documented the early days offline.

But slowly, as I’m feeling more like myself and getting into the rhythm of motherhood, I am hoping to find my pen here again…thank you for staying with me during this transformative time.

The early days were a bit of a blur. Thankfully, we had a great birth story - my water actually broke (which we learned in birthing class is rare!). My parents were scheduled to arrive the morning he was born so they came straight to the hospital. Baby JD was delivered healthily at 7 lbs. 14 oz. and 21 in. long at 2:16PM on a Tuesday in June. We are so in love with him. It is still so surreal.

Settling in at home, we just soaked it all in. I could not believe he was here! We had literally “finished” the house just weeks earlier (more on that later). As we navigated feeding, cuddles, sleep (or lack thereof), and all things newborn, I was so grateful to my family and friends who supported us during this time. My parents stayed with us for some time. My friends who are moms reached out with love and support. It was truly so incredible and something I’ll never take for granted.

Some of my favorite early memories include when he first started to recognize our dog. We walk everyday and after a while, he’d look down from his stroller at Roman and just smile at him. It was (and still is) the cutest thing.

Snuggling for naps was life giving. Also, we loved babywearing! Literally saved me so many times either to get out of the house and/or for contact naps when needed.

Hearing his first giggle. IYKYK. It melts your heart and makes EVERYTHING better. The gummy smiles are just the best.

It’s amazing with a baby how time seems to move slow and yet so fast. Already, 7 months have come and gone, and the changes are beyond belief! Little JD is a happy baby and so social/aware. He loves to be part of everything and is very active! He’s currently working on crawling (he’s got the scooting/army crawl down). And he loves to roar and hear his voice! He is genuinely fun and has the best giggles.

We’ve now also entered the world of solid food. We are doing a mix of purees and baby led weaning and so far, he loves to eat! It is a fun (and messy) time.

We’ve had a lot of adventures, too for his early days. So many people advised us to get him out and try and remain active as possible. He’s traveled with us to Tahoe, Colorado, and Arizona. We love walks on the beach and dancing in the kitchen.

There’s even more love in our home now. It’s like JD brought out this other side of it in all of us. I’ve loved getting to see his older brothers care for him. It is so special and he is so lucky to have them as role models. I hope they will look back and see how special it is to watch him grow as well.

Motherhood is wild. Parenthood is wild. I feel like so much of it is within you but I’ve also really struggled at times with getting caught up in the internet/info age. And sleep - oh my, that is whole other topic that I wish I was a little more prepared for! JD has been pretty high contact from the beginning so we only recently moved him in his room. And even now, he still wakes at night (and sometimes he doesn’t!). Nothing is consistent and that in and of itself has probably been the hardest thing for me yet. Just when you think you have something figured out, it changes! And time… those early days are all consuming with baby. It’s lovely but it’s exhausting, and you can lose yourself in it all (not to mention you’re trying to heal, too). For me, it was also hard to understand how my relationship with my husband would evolve. I feel like we’re rediscovering each other all over again - and it’s forcing us to “work” at it more. Maybe that’s a good thing, and I know we’ll grow through it. Motherhood is getting easier, but I’m still a ways from truly finding that “balance” - and even then, really do you?? Maybe you just get better at going with the flow - something I’ve been working on for a while.

I know that as hard as it is, it is even more beautiful. To watch baby’s face light up when he sees you. To hold him close. To know that together, you form this incredible, everlasting bond. And that only you and your partner could have created this little being.

I’m sure many parents feel this way, but I swear that kid will change the world. I know he’s changed ours in the best of ways.